a mere 24 hours, less, and once again all that was up is down and vice versa. i must learn to live this feeling of unease, yes, but apparently i'm not learning very fast.
a little numbed out now at the sheer overwhelm of emotional things happening. my emotional body can't keep up with the pace and has checked out, trusting that the rest will somehow take care.
i guess my desires and intentions are the same as for last night--to be nurtured. but really, now, i just want to be alone. just feel tired of people. people disappointing, people that don't know me, talking on that skin deep layer that is so dissatisfying. right now i crave my own quiet company, but somehow i seem to have left the building. so much outward focus that i can't even find myself and THAT is a very lonely feeling. how can so much happen in the span of just one week?
and the parallels are striking, disturbing. stop this ride please because i want to get off.
a little numbed out now at the sheer overwhelm of emotional things happening. my emotional body can't keep up with the pace and has checked out, trusting that the rest will somehow take care.
i guess my desires and intentions are the same as for last night--to be nurtured. but really, now, i just want to be alone. just feel tired of people. people disappointing, people that don't know me, talking on that skin deep layer that is so dissatisfying. right now i crave my own quiet company, but somehow i seem to have left the building. so much outward focus that i can't even find myself and THAT is a very lonely feeling. how can so much happen in the span of just one week?
and the parallels are striking, disturbing. stop this ride please because i want to get off.
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