the falls

friday afternoon i was psyched about cooking up lots of sadeh vegis (garlic, onions, squash...and my first stab at wild rice!) for a big ole' shabbat dinner, but halfway through the afternoon i burned out on the social tension. my half of the bedroom i share had digressed into a disorganized, spiritually draining and irredemable mess. then jordon came to my rescue and we biked to the falls (of falls village). its a beautiful ride, on little country roads dappled with golden light shining through the tunnel of turning leaves. i vented some on the way, just getting shit off my chest. but when we got there, we entered a different, sacred space. sitting at the top of giant slabs or rock that curve gently down to to the tumbling falls, our souls unhinged and dissolved into the rocks and air. it was like resting in the hand of god, held gently in a giant love. we talked more, about our deapest fears and insecurities, about the shapes we saw in the clouds and our favorite parts of the waterfall (this calm pool, that bubbling spray)...and about how much we loved each other. it is so satisfying and empowering to feel such a strong and deep love and connection in a completely non-sexual way. when we finally dragged ourselves away and swooped down the hill towards home, i felt deeply healed.

the theme of this week is lonliness in a crowd. what i've noticed is that the times i feel most happy, open, and connected are in prayer, while playing music and when connecting deeply and authentically with another person. often they're not that different from each other.